The Space Between Power and Grace
Leadership: Where confidence meets humility and ego learns to listen
Leadership, at its best, isn’t a performance of authority but a practice of awareness. Between power and grace lies a still point where we decide whether to lead from ego or empathy.
This concept is encapsulated in Jung’s Transcendent Function (1916)—the idea that within each of us live opposing forces: power and humility, control and surrender, logic and intuition, persona and shadow. It’s not a mystical experience but a psychological one, creating transformation within the self. Power and grace stand in this tension where, when ego meets empathy, awareness is born.
The Nature of Power and Meaning of Grace
Power in creative work often disguises itself as passion. It speaks loudly, interrupts, and demands to be heard. But power without grace burns fast; it leaves little room for listening. Brené Brown describes a version of power without grace as “power over.” Of the seven elements she identifies, one stands out: “Believing that power is finite and using fear to protect and hoard it.” Exercising these “power over” qualities isn’t exclusive to management—it trickles down into everyday contributors. I’ve witnessed moments where being right, or ensuring one’s conviction is implemented, overshadows collaboration. At times, someone might undermine a colleague or become the loudest critic of what’s wrong with the work, growing irate in the process. Yet, there’s a caveat: “power over” in the professional landscape often hides an undercurrent of insecurity, anxiety, and fear—it’s rarely malicious. Sometimes it simply reflects someone trying to grasp their self-worth, to prove it both to themselves and to others.
The counterpart to power is grace. Grace is the art of holding space—for tension, for imperfection, for the quiet ones in the room who haven’t yet found their voice. This aligns with Brown’s concept of “power with/to/within,” which believes that power becomes infinite when shared. Leading from that focal point of with, to, and within translates into stewardship. To steward means to take care of, and caring is woven into grace. Grace, in this context, is goodwill in motion—to do honor or credit to someone or something. For me, that’s the embodiment of integrity.
Ego and the Lesson of Listening
Ego is not bad. Many misrepresent it as self-centeredness or narcissism, but it isn’t. According to Jungian psychology, ego is our “command HQ,” organizing thoughts, feelings, senses, and intuition, and regulating access to memory. It’s the part that links our inner and outer worlds, shaping how we relate to what’s external. In this way, ego helps us survive and understand. There are times when it whispers through defensiveness or silence, and times when it’s loud and bold. Our work is to recognize when it’s ours—and when it’s someone else’s—and to respond rather than react. In a nutshell, ego is the I, and the collective is the us. Yet we can’t discount the I, nor can we ignore the larger us. Leadership carries a form of power, and how it’s executed means everything within that relationship. We all walk the tightrope between power and humility, control and surrender, logic and intuition. We can’t rid ourselves of ego, but we can witness it, respond to it, and have compassion for it as we learn the balancing act required for maturity and deep integration. This is a balance I’ve walked—and keep walking. As I’ve gained experience, I’ve noticed myself listening more, speaking less, and moving through the world with greater intentionality. Not perfectly, but with progress and grace.
Integration: New Model of Leadership
What does this all mean? Leadership is the balancing act of power and grace—not solely executional or emotional, but a rich mixture of both. Stepping into and modeling leadership also means learning to be responsible with visibility, which is linked to all of this. The ego can get lost in visibility and swing the sword that is power without intention. Real leadership lives in the space between knowing and learning, between direction and dialogue. Power gives us the mic; grace reminds us to hand it back.
